No resolutions for this one.

[kirby1024]

I have perhaps been conspicuous in my silence since my previous, extremely short post, and I suspect that some have speculated as to exactly what happenned on Wednesday at the Police Station. Perhaps my silence has been telling to many of you.

Put bluntly, I had every one of my suspicions confirmed. After telling my story to the SOCAU detective, he indicated that the prognosis for my case was quite grim. Because of the rather... grey nature of the case, It's highly unlikely that the case would reach court. Actually, to be entirely frank, it's not even guaranteed that detectives would even begin an investigation, as it would apparently be quite difficult to determine whether an offence even occured.

To put that last sentence into perspective for people, the question, legally, is not whether the rape did or did not occur, or whether he was there at the time. The question, in my case, is whether he knew that he was doing something wrong. In the story as I recall it, and as I told to the detective, there's a probability that the guy who raped me thought that he had managed to talk to me sufficiently that I was comfortable with the procedings. If that is, in fact, what he thought happenned, then he may not have actually committed an offence. Of course, even if he did know what he did, it's still a he said/he said situation, and I've got no aces up my sleeve to push the scales on to my side.

So, as one might expect, I was not exactly thrilled with this state of affairs. To be honest, I broke down crying when I told my parents about what happenned. My mum ended up coming over to help me through the night. Helped me go through things, helped me make lists, pushed me to go through the hoops of living. Mum, like she often does, pointed out to me that it was natural that I was breaking down at this point, considering the other stressors that are happening in my life. I've still got fireflyfaery issues. My current job will be ending in the next couple of weeks and I'm going to need to find a new job, and I earn too little (and my parents earn too much) for Centrelink to give me money to live. I've got an essay due next week that I've barely started. And that's just the issues that are appropriate for me to discuss publically. I've got a lot of shit on my plate right about now, and I think I used up a lot of my emotional reserve in the last week or two on this issue in particular.

The question, of course, is where I go from here. It's a good question, actually, one that I may have to spend some time answering. The detective at SOCAU said that it may be useful for me to actually go to CASA and get counselled (because, as much as I know that I probably should, I haven't actually done so yet), and to that end I have an appointment with SECASA for Monday afternoon. The detective at SOCAU indicated to me that if I do feel that I want to continue forth with my case, I need only call. But I think I need to get some help and ask myself what I actually want, and whether I'm strong enough to go through with this to the end if that's what I decide. I'm losing nothing with time; the case will be just as strong in a few months as it is now. If it takes a month or two to figure out what I need, I don't see why I shouldn't give myself that at least.

For tonight, however, I shall sleep. I think I need sleep, because I've been horribly, horribly tired the last few days, perhaps with good reason.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

The legal system means well, but sometimes, it cannot punish all the offenders,which is where your friends step in. Of course, the "lynching" style is so last century and generally frowned upon, but i have learnt that it does have it's place in society. Where the system cannot act, your networks and friends can. In short, leave it to us. We can make him understand.

[(Anonymous)]

The legal system means well, but it cannot punish all the offenders,which is where your friends step in. Of course, the "lynching" style is so last century and generally frowned upon, but i have learned that it does have it's place in society. Where the system cannot act, your networks and friends can. In short, leave it to us. We can make him understand.

[iosef.livejournal.com]

Big hugs. I'm not surprised, just going by you first post I realised that the Mens Rea was going to be a difficulty. Get the counseling and realise that your friends are here for you and love you. It was not your fault.

[twilight-dew.livejournal.com]

Hey sweetie. I'm really sorry to hear what's happened with the legal system, though, as I suspect you are also, I am not surprised. As you mentioned, the case in many aspects is legally 'grey', which makes it difficult for the professionals invovled to work with the evidence. Nonetheless, it is a huge step that you took going to report it, and for that we are very proud of you :) It's also wonderful that you have such loving and supportive parents who are helping you to work through this difficult time. I agree that you should get the counselling you need, and it's great to hear that you've made an appointment. I hope it goes well for you.

Stay safe poppet.

Jen xx

[placetohide.livejournal.com]

It's horrible that the law can't do much for you in this circumstance, but at least you have somewhere to go from here. I really hope that you can get counseling and work out some of your feelings about it. :(

[not-in-denial.livejournal.com]

I have the most incredible brainfog in the history of man, so I can't really offer anything constructive but I wanted to leave a comment with *hugs* to show i care anyway. :/ *hugs!*

[kunoichi-chan.livejournal.com]

*hug*

The first priority now is to take care of yourself, now that you've done all you can to stop this rapist. That's a big step, and a brave one. Although the outcome sucks, it's now on record and you can always call back. But do take care of yourself...

[cheshire-bitten.livejournal.com]

Look after yourself, I am sorry that this has happened, rape law in this country is fucked, I wish we recognised positive consent, or at least enforced the laws we already had, but that it is not your fight, you need to heal.

Love.


Rhiannon

[laurenmitchell.livejournal.com]

Take your time. I hope SECASA helps; in my experience, CASA's counsellors are the best to talk to about things like this.

If SOCA are saying at this stage that it doesn't look like it'll go anywhere, then it probably won't. That's what they said to me. But it needs to be your decision whether you push it as far as it can go anyway -- even if all you do is give your statement and have him interviewed, it will shake him up a bit and make him think twice next time he's obtaining consent.

*hugs* Stay strong. You're doing great.

[taiba.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I commend your bravery, even if the legal system can't do much. Getting him interviewed like princesslaruene said might be something worth pushing for, just to get across that he can't just do this to people. But as many others have said, the important thing now is to look after yourself and focus on dealing with it completely.

We all love you, and you can turn to any one of us if you need to talk.

*hugs*

[ozwiccagal.livejournal.com]

*hugs* from overhere and i'll give you more when i get home, i think i summed it up on wednesday i think it was when i said "fuck"

[(Anonymous)]

It's awful that there's no criminal case that can be brought. You've shown amazing courage in dealing with this. It's probably the last thing on your mind at the moment - but you should talk to the uni about special consideration for your study if you haven't already done so.
Hugs and take care,
Polly

[minxdragon.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry, It sucks when the legal system fails, it's so black and white. but like so many have said, you are so strong, it took a lot of courage to go to the police in the first place and to go so SECASA. we are here for you and we love you. The failure of the legal system is not your fault and neither was this horrible event. *hugs*

[omnot.livejournal.com]

When you consider the difficulties involved in proving and prosecuting rape, even in nearly perfect stereotypical instances, I think that your going to the police has been stunningly courageous. We all know that the system is broken.

You have said that you doubt that you will reap more than the knowledge that you did what you needed to - what was right, in reporting what was done to you, for your own sake. Yet we also know that it is through the cumulative effect of many such actions on the part of victims that change is wrought - in the legal system, in the support that is available, and in the mind-sets of potential perpetrators and actual victims.

You've done good. If I believed in Gods, I'd ask them to bless you, but I don't so all I can wish you is balance. It really is time the sun shone on you, and I hope it does so soon - and more fully now that you have taken such worthy actions to clear your sky of this particular cloud.